We CAN'T Be Related
by Fanficaddict12
Summary: While getting his 'Robotical,' Bender finds his long lost brother, Fender. After finding out that he is a goody two shoes and is nothing like him at all, Bender becomes furious with him. How far will he go to get rid of him? One - shot.


-_- I know Fender is a couple name for Fry and Bender, so I don't wanna hear it, ok? Thanks. Just for future reference...Enjoy the fic.

-

Inside Planet Express, Fry and Bender were relaxing on the couch, watching a new episode of the Scary Door.

"You ever wonder what makes you skin stay on?" the narrator said on the TV. "Do you ever wonder what the meaning of life is? Well if you want the answers to those questions, you probably shouldn't be watching: The Scary Door."

As the two were watching TV, Hermes stormed in with mail in her hand, looking unhappy. He glared at Bender.

"What?" Bender asked.

"You've been late for your Robotical for around 3 weeks now!" Hermes exclaimed.

"Robotical?" Fry asked.

"You know, a physical, but for-"

"Robots, I got it."

"Only robot physicals are much more serious. It says if you don't go to your Robotical by tomorrow, you'll be deactivated."

"Well it's they're fault!" Just then Leela walked into the room. "I never got a single letter saying I needed a Robotical!"

"Not true," Leela said. "I say a letter for it in your locker just 3 weeks ago."

"How do you know that?"

"I looked in there to see if that GPS you borrowed from me was still in there."

"Check the pawn shop." Bender leaned back on the couch again, his hands on his head, his legs crossed. "Alright, I'll go, but Leela has to drive me there, and Fry has to go too, since, well, we're pretty much a trio."

"Damn straight!" Fry exclaimed.

At Mom's Friendly Robot Company, Fry and Leela were sitting down bored as a robot specialist was looking through Bender's opened head, looking for any technical problems. He then closed the top.

"Congrats Bender, you're fully functional. You may leave now." said the robot specialist.

"Whatever," Bender said. He got off the bed and scratched his "shiny metal ass." Fry and Leela got up too, and as they did, a robot looking almost identical to Bender, except for the fact that he was shiny white, came into the room with an upbeat attitude and handed the doctor a cup of oil.

"Here's that oil you wanted, Doco." the shiny white robot said.

"Thank you, Fender." the robot specialist said.

"Hey Bender, doesn't that robot kinda look like you?" Fry said, pointing at Fender.

Bender examined the robot. "No way! Besides, he looks way too nice to be me."

Fender turned around and examined Bender. He gasped. "Can it be?" He then removed a mug shot of Bender from his compartment in his chest, just like Benders. "I don't believe it! You're my long lost brother, Bender!"

Fry and Leela gasped. "What!?" Bender exclaimed with disbelief. "There's no way we could be related! Unless our Relative Links meet."

Bender and Fender took out their Relative Links: a tiny plug and outlet together on one wire out from a robot's head that allows two robots to see if they're related. If both the plugs fit into each others outlets, they're related. The two tried to plug their links into each other outlets. It fit. Bender gasped. "No....that's not true....THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE!!"

"Search you feelings you know it to be true," Fender said. "Brother!" Fender gave Bender a big hug, while Bender was screaming "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

With Fender, the gang flew back to Planet Express. They four walked into the conference room where the rest of the gang was sitting.

"We're back." Bender said. "Oh, and this is my long lost brother Fender." He sat down, and so did the other three, and the rest of the gang was shocked.

"Bender, I didn't know you had a brother." Amy said.

"That makes two of us."

"It had to be the most bizarre physical I've ever been too." Leela said.

"Not me. In my last physical in the 20th century it turns out my dad wasn't my actual dad." Fry said.

"So, why is he here?" Hermes asked.

"Oh, I just see where my little brother worked." Fender said.

"Little!?" Bender exclaimed.

"Yeah, I'm half an hour older."

"SO??"

"Well, anyway, the real reason I wanted to come here was because I just quit my job and I really need work."

"Then good news everyone!" the Professor said. "You'll be sending a package to the parallel universe known as the Chocolate Milky way with your new co - worker, Fender."

"WHAT!?" Bender shouted in a unapporving tone.

"Oh boy!" Fender said. "Now I get to spend more time with my little brother!" He raced to the Planet Express Ship and shouted from the entrance: "Come on!"

The four were driving through space. Leela was driving as usual, Fry was sitting in his usual seat, Fender was seating opposite to him, and Bender was seating next to Leela, mumbling to himself.

"Stupid brother," he mumbled. "Stupid Robotical. We can't be related, we just can't!"

"Come on Bender," Leela said, "couldn't you just try to get to know your brother a little better?"

"No way!"

"Say Fender," Fry said, "why did you quit your last job?"

"Oh," Fender said "well I was bending things just like my brother. But I couldn't stomach that place after I knew what I was doing it for..."

"What was that?"

"Suicide Booths."

"See Bender? You and your brother both left the same job for the same reason, except he didn't try to commit suicide." Leela said.

"Don't pull that crap on me!" Bender said, getting angry. "We are nothing alike! We come from to different worlds! I'll never like him..."

2 weeks later in the conference room, the whole gang, except for Fender, were sitting in the conference room, annoyed.

"Has anybody else noticed how annoying Fender's upbeat attitude is?" Fry asked.

"Spluh, everybody is annoyed with that stupid robot." Amy said.

"Well I like it!" Zoidberg said, "He waxes my shell every day. I'm so shiny!"

"I'm considering firing him," Hermies said. "What do you think Professor?"

The Professor instantly woke up from the nap he was just taking. "Awha?"

"How long has that stupid brother of mine been here?" Bender said."

"2 weeks," Leela said.

"Ok, that's the necessary number of weeks." Bender squinted, thinking of some evil way to get rid of Fender.

Later that night in the closet of Bender and Fry's apartment, Bender went to the place where he hid his weapons. He took out a big bazooka, filled it with ammo, and walked toward the door. "Well, I'm off to kill Fender." he said to Fry, who was relaxing on the couch watching TV.

"Can you get some more Slurm while you're out there? We're all out."

"Sure thing."

The bazooka on his shoulder, Bender marched down 5 floors to Fender's room. He kicked the door open, then kicked open the closet door and aimed the bazooka at Fender. "Prepare to die!"

Fender quickly turned around, hiding something behind him. "WAH! Cops - Wait, Bender? You're a cop?"

"What!? No! I've come here to - Wait, what are you hiding behind your back?"

"Huh? Oh, um nothing. I'm not hiding anything!" Just then the thing he was shiding slipped out of his hand and landed on the floor. It was a giant blue gem. Bender gasped.

"Is that the Gem of Water!? From the New New York National Museum!?"

"Um, maybe it is, maybe it isn't...Ok, I can't lie to you brother. I stole it. Its just a horrible habit of mine. I'm so ashamed of it. I've tried therapy and everything, but nothing worked."

"Are you kidding? It's a great habit! Now we both have something in common! Hold, wait, how were you able to steal that? That museum's security system is impossible to get past!"

"Well, I hate to brag," Fender rubbed his chest with his fist in a gloating fashion. "But I am a world class thief."

Bender was overcome with emotion. "Brother!"

The two hugged. And witht that, the police swarmed into the room.

"Freeze!" Smitty said. "We have you surrounded." Bender and Fender were horrified at how many cops were here. Smitty sees the bazooka bender had dropped on the floor. "Ah, perfect!" He picked up the bazooka and shot Fender with it, making him explode into a million pieces in the closet. URL picked up Fender's head.

"If you can't do the time, don't do the crime. Ah yeah." he said. He placed Fender's head in a box and the police left, leaving Bender on his knees sulking.

Fry dashed into the room. "Aw man, did I miss it?"

"Yeah," Bender sobbed, "and we were just starting to get along..."

"Aw, do you need to be alone?"

"Yes..."

Fry left the room, leaving a depressed Bender on his knees holding apiece of his destroyed brother.

-

This was my first Futurama fic. I hope you liked it!


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